on 16.12.14
it's crazy how we all live in societies and praise gods and leaders that teach love and acceptance, and things like this continue to happen everyday all around the world. christians, muslims, jews: we were all one religion at some point, we all still praise the god of abraham, the only difference is that we chose to follow a different person to teach us about our god. we all live in one planet, we all desire one thing: to live a good life and be with our creator after our time here is over. i don't understand why things like this happen. it makes me so angry. are these people so invested in satan that they want to make their and everyone's lives miserable? are they forced to do this by a single evil body? these people don't deserve their freedom of movement, they deserve to be locked up in a prison cell for the rest of their lives. and when i say life, i actually mean until the day they die, not the 20-25 years that is considered "life" in australia. the people that have died in the last day from the situation in sydney, someone in there could have been someone who one day will change the world, ended all of this. i don't even know what to say anymore, this whole thing makes zero sense at all. i can only conclude with that some people are idiots and this picture my mum shared on facebook :)


on 18.9.14
hello people of the internet! so basically this morning i had an anxiety attack, but it was worse than usual...it turned into some psychotic breakdown, ripped out some [a lot] of my hair and yeah, we needed to fix it up. so my mum's friend, who is amazing, fit me in and she fixed my hair up, it's super short, but i love it. i still have a bald patch, but i can cover it.

it looks almost the same as it did from the front because i always tied my hair back, but it feels amazing lol.
on 7.9.14
hello people of the internet! so chase had the baby! her name is lily :)







she also grew into a child...so yeah.



my chase is pregnant again! ahh!

- peace! :)
hello people of the internet! so the sims 4 came out last thursday (i got the collector's edition, i ordered the strategy guide, but it probably won't come until tomorrow) and i began playing it without realizing i was going to start blogging about it all. i was going to reset the game, but i like where i'm at so i'm going to start here.

so these are the sims i'm currently playing with:


















their names are chase green and james halpern. they got married yesterday so chase changed her name.

they also just tried for a baby last time i played. so hopefully they have a baby soon!

this is also the house they're living in - built by me!




i've perfected the house since these photos were taken, if you have a good eye you'll notice a kitchen counter in the master bedroom! there's also three empty bedrooms because there's gonna be kids there, and i just thought i'd build the house as i'd eventually need it to be to save some time. 

this game is amazing! even though it's got heaps of simple stuff missing, i like it so much more than i do sims 3!!! 

- peace! :)

p.s.: if you play, you can follow me at MusicIsLife9797 !!!

on 30.8.14
the wait is almost over! on september 4, i will be the proud owner of the sims 4 collector's edition! i know in north america it's released on september 2, but technically it's only one day when you consider time zones. but i'm so exited!

there's been heaps of crap being talked about the fact that there will be no pools, no toddlers, and loading screens between places, but honestly, it's not bothering me, i've waited for this game for over a year, and i've been obsessed with the whole "franchise" forever. 

a few days ago, i had a problem. the system requirements for the sims 4 were released...and oh crap. in my mind, i thought they had released the minimum system requirements and my computer didn't meet those requirements - i'd already paid for the game and everything - but after a few days of sheer panic and frustration, i worked everything out, and my computer meets the system requirements! even a computer less powerful than mine will be able to handle the game, so i'm just ecstatic!

i downloaded the create a sim demo when it was released, and i've made many sims. i've even created the whole house m.d. cast from season 1-8 (i'm obsessed with house, i watch it almost everyday - seen every episode at lease 2-3 times). i also created myself, who will be the sim that i play the game with.

i might do something with the sims 4, put some of my game online or something...idk. i'll do something. in the sims 3, i've been playing one game for the past 3 years and have 11 generations, if i'm going to do the same for the sims 4 i think i want to show you guys!

i'm so excited for this!!!! it just looks so amazing!  
on 23.8.14
i was diagnosed with aspergers in may 2011, i was 13 years old. after i was diagnosed and learned more about it there's so many things that make so much more sense now.

until i was about 12 i'd block my ears in many situations. when bathroom hand-dryers were on, in the car, walking past a busy road, walking past construction, and just anything loud. when i was really young i'd even block my ears when i sneezed, coughed, or yawned.

i could never make friends. no matter how hard i tried, friends would never come. i've had probably one friend throughout kindergarten, primary school, and high school, but even she probably hated me for the most part, we were family friends. when i was in grade one, someone in my class did something that put the whole class into hysterics, it was hilarious. one day, a similar situation presented itself, so i decided to make the same joke, and i was made fun of. i swear i didn't do anything differently. i'd ask to play with someone, and then they'd tell me i'm being rude, i swear i'm acting the same as everyone else! eventually i just wanted to be alone. when i was seven i found some imaginary friends, and i still have those imaginary friends. they're real people, they don't look like anyone in particular, but they never excluded me, because they basically were me.

i live in a totally different world. my coping mechanism for life if not living in the real world. i have a whole different life, different friends, no family. it's not a perfect life, i have had some terrible experiences and times in that life, this makes it more realistic. this life is very time consuming, because obviously i can't get anything from this life done when i'm living a different life, because that'd confuse everything. i'd be a lot more productive without it, but then again, i probably wouldn't be alive without it.

i'm obsessed with medicine and random facts about anything. i'm on verge of memorizing all the arteries in the human body. i can name all the muscles, bones, organs. i'm obsessed with disease, especially cancer. i can tell you almost anything about cancer. i can tell you a lot about things to do with the human body. i know the exact treatment procedures for over forty different cancers for people of different ages, grading, and expectations. i can properly read CBC test results, i can name all the types of blood cells, and all the types of blood cells within blood cells, and so on. i'd love to be an oncologist, but the only problem is...i SUCK at math. so i'm going to settle for a clinical psychologist, still diagnosing and treating people, just less messy and a lot easier.

i'm antisocial. i don't like people. if i had the choice, i'd never speak to a person again. if i was put into solitary confinement in prison, it'd be a reward, not a punishment. it's not a personal thing, i do like people for who they are, i think people are friendly and easy to be around, but i'd prefer to not be around anybody, ever. in fact, we have two families at our house right now, and instead of being with my friends i'm sitting in my room writing this.

i'm a person of habit. diagnosed with OCD, but a lot of aspies have this. everything has to stay the same. i have to always use the exact same brand and model of pens, everything has to be perfectly neat. i get everything done all the time so it's all consistent. i do things at the same time everyday, i eat the same things. i do the same subjects every year. it's tough for me to add something new into my schedule. it makes me very uneasy.

i'm too anxious and scared. i was diagnosed with severe generalized anxiety disorder in 2006, at age 8 after developing a fear of food which resulted in hospitalization and treatment for kidney infection and sepsis blood infection. food basically made me pass out. that fear hasn't totally gone away, it's gotten better since i started taking sertraline in 2011. since the hospitalization, my diet became very limited. i've always had a fear of vomiting. i don't like chicken because chicken causes more food poisoning than any other meat. i stopped eating all fruit because i became allergic to kiwi which made my face blow up and made me vomit a few times. i went without fruit for 4 years until i decided to eat an apple one day. slowly i've gotten more confident with food, and i can now eat apples, bananas, sultanas, grapes, strawberries, apricots, pineapple, blueberries, blackberries, blackcurrants, raspberries, watermelon, and cantaloupe. though i'm still terrified of vomiting, i've sort of realized that many things won't actually make me sick.

i annoy myself. i'm not sure this is an aspie thing, because i've never actually heard of this. as much as people annoy the crap out of me, i annoy myself just as much. i cannot stand the sound of me chewing, it makes me want to rip out my teeth, and i cannot stand the sound of my breathing. i'm not a loud breather, thank goodness, but because i've had a cold for the past 11 weeks, and every other time i have a cold, i get so dang annoyed at my heavy and whistling breathing, so much i can't sleep.

there's a lot more things, but this thing is already super long, so yeah. bye!
on 19.7.14
i'm gonna begin with the cliche "gays", because i just wanna get this over and done with. people think "coming out" is a big deal. but why? straight people don't come out. it's 2014, what happened to equality?! people don't need to know who you like, people shouldn't care who you like. i also hate it when people say "gay people are always nice to everyone" and "gay people are awesome"... what is it exactly that makes them "awesome"? is it the fact that they like to have sex with people who have the same bits in between their legs, because that's the only difference.

so many people think that because someone doesn't do something their way, it's wrong. but why is that person wrong? probably because they're introverted, smaller, or just a target. if someone wants to wear makeup half an inch thick - let them! it's their body, they can do what they want with it. people go around saying "be yourslef [blah blah blah blah blah]", and then they judge someone for wearing this shirt that they just happen to like, causing them to stop wearing it, meaning they're not totally being themselves. i've seen people being judged for a piece of thread hanging off their shirt, like, WHAT?!

what is really normal though?